Whether they are a Christian are not should not be a litmus test for a good spouse. There are many types of Christians, and people are in different stages of their walk. They may not be at the same level that you are in their spiritual journey. Furthermore, there are people who say they are Christians because they were raised in the church. Some no longer attend, and sometimes those that do aren’t bearing godly fruit.
There is such a thing as being a “Sunday Christian”. This refers to someone who sits in the pew on Sunday out of habit. It is just something they do, but gain no value from it. They hear the message, but it has no impact on their life. They are passive about their faith.
When you examine their life, you will see there is no fruit. There is no difference between their lives and someone who is unsaved. They live their life according to the world- not the Word. So, while they may be a Christian, you may want someone who is as passionate as Christ as you are.
Good looking and great personality are great characteristics, but are they enough? Appearances will only take you so far before the “chemistry” starts to fizzle. This isn’t enough to sustain a marriage long-term. Great personalities are wonderful. Yet, if they don’t possess godly characteristics, then your relationship may have some hard work ahead of it.
Too often we settle for less than God’s best
Sometimes, we rush things when it comes to relationships. We are so excited to have found someone or the physical attraction is so great that we don’t see others for who they are. We overlook red flags or excuse bad behavior. Sometimes we dismiss big things justifying that they will change or we can get them to change. The truth is, that only God can change them- no one else. Are you prepared for that?
We are heirs of the most high God. Who says that we have to settle for less than His best? He knows the person that we need better than we do. If we wait, the relationship will be wonderful because it will be perfect. The couple will provide balance and strength to each other. When we are too quick to jump in, it can lead us to heartbreak whether we eventually get married or not.
What Should I Look For?
Davina Stallworth guides readers through things to consider when looking to get married. Being a Christian is a low standard. It should be one of many great qualities that God has designed for your future spouse. There are things to look for in a spouse and red flags that simply say, “run”. If we ignore these, then we can set ourselves up for a lifetime of pain.
We pray for wisdom and guidance over your search to find a perfect mate. We know that it’s hard and can be frustrating waiting. However, God is always faithful, and they will come in His timing.
Our next issue comes out on September 28, 2021!