“I Was so sure we would be together forever. What went wrong?”
Trying to find the person that God has for you can be tough. Even more frustrating is when you think that you have found your spouse only to have them break up with you. How is healing possible when you feel like you were rejected? Where is the happily ever after? “Was it my fault? Did I misunderstand? Was I wrong?” you ask yourself, trying to make sense of it all.
Yet, you can’t. Sometimes in searching for the answers we find ourselves in a self-perpetuating state of despair.
Were you wrong?
Maybe, or maybe not. They could have been the one that God had selected for you. However, the other side to the story is that even though they may have been the one, we sometimes get things wrong.
God has given us a wonderful thing called self-will to make decisions on our own. We chose to follow Him, or Satan. In our mulling things over in our mind, sometimes we make the wrong decisions, or we let fear stand in our way. The person could have been the one for you, but they may have messed it up. Or maybe we heard wrong, or misinterpreted things in our eagerness.
So what Does this mean? What do I do? How do I heal?
The bottom line is that sometimes we don’t know why things didn’t work out. Unless God reveals the answer to you, don’t get caught up in the negativity of the why. Analyze your part in the relationship: What could you have done better? Where do you need to improve? Then work on yourself, and healing. That’s all you can do.
The good news is that even though this relationship didn’t work out, you are not a failure! God will bring someone else along. You just have to be patient.
James George discusses reconciling feelings of disappointment/failure when relationships don’t work out, and the frustration that may ensue. James also talks candidly to those who just want to find the right person the first time, but things didn’t turn out that way. He talks about how to get over it, heal, and move on.
This feature and more in our next issue of Faith Filled Family coming out on September 26, 2019!