In our culture, dating has become more like, “try it before you buy it” as opposed to trying to find that person that God has selected for you. Our children are experiencing so much heartbreak from entering into relationship after relationship in trying to find that special someone in which they can spend the rest of their lives with. The problem: all of this dating and breaking up contributes to emotional baggage. This baggage, in turn, gets carried into each subsequent relationship- and yes, even into marriage!
Emotional Scarring When Dating? Yeah, right!
Yeah, right! Every time you connect with someone and break up, you carry emotional baggage. “Was I not pretty/good enough?”, “Why did they not want me?”, “They must have found someone else”, “They did find someone else”, “It must have something to do with me- there is something wrong with me…” and so on. If you have ever had those conversations inside of your head and been affected by them, they you are carrying baggage. This same baggage- hurts from breaking up, harshness of words- stick with us and form our perceptions of others. So the next person you meet, you are already applying a filter of past experiences to. Is this really fair to the other person? Is this really fair to you?
Not to mention the repeated emotional highs and lows, temptation of intimacy, etc that all accompany the dating scene.
This brings us to one of the topics in our May issue: Is the idea of courting old-fashioned? Most dads would say absolutely not- especially when it comes to their “little girls”. And most not-so-little-anymore-dad almost women are thinking, “I’m never going to get married!” (*lol*).
L. Carter will explore the idea of courting versus dating, and bring to light many of the benefits of courting over dating. She will discuss what are the best practices to put into place when your children are seeking a mate in regards to maintaining purity. Additionally, whether there is merit to chaperoned dates, and group dates.
Our next issue will be released on April 26, and it deals with how to train up godly children.